Lensman

Considered response - Yes.

The French are revolting.

Well, some of them are.

Couldn't resist, sincere apologies to anyone French who is in anyway offended.

1/ Wear a hat of any description (unless you are chauffeur a milkman or over 70. Definitely never wear a baseball cap unless you want to look like an idiot)

2/ Drive with your fog lights on in the rain – the hint her is in the name ‘Fog Lights’ (unless of course visibility is less than 100 yards and if you can’t cope pull over and wait till the sun comes out – but then you’re probably be the type to brake into the setting/rising sun rather than just putting on a pair of sunglasses, just because you are going slower it doesn’t mean you’ll see any better. In fact the slower you travel the slower the light from objects in front of you will reach your optic nerve – check out E=MC2 if you don’t believe me)

3/ Never get in the way of a blue Volvo of any model or year (that should cover me)

4/ Use your shoulder to hold your mobile phone to your ear – this leads to involuntary steering as you shorten one arm’s grip on the wheel

5/ Drink – you’ll only spill it

6/ Smoke a pipe – unless you are in a pre war vintage car that has a max speed of less then 20 mph

7/ Stab your fellow motorists – it’s not nice so don’t get into the habit

8/ Brake for no reason – that big coloured thing in your rear view mirror is another car and if you stop for no reason there’s a good chance it’ll end up wedged in your rear end (that’s the rear end of your car – not you)

9/ Pick your nose – you might feel invisible but over 70% of your car is made of a transparent material called ‘glass’. Transparent means see through and if you can see out, others can see in. Remember the old saying; “People in glass houses should have a toilet in the basement”

10/ Listen to Radio 1. This is a station designed for those too young to drive and if anyone overhears you’ll be obvious as a twat with no taste in music and with very limited intelligence. I mean, ‘New’s Beat’ (?) there’s more beat than news and even that is out of sync. Like having a audio only version of Newsround without the in-depth science bits.

OK. A friend and I have made a discovery. It’s not particularly earth shattering but I thought I would share it with you all anyway
After all, that’s what this BLOG is for; transmitting useless information from person to person and hopefully keeping us all interested.

Have you ever had your mobile phone on in the car when a call is coming in whilst listening to the radio, or you move between transmitter coverage? If you have you’ll know that just before the phone rings there’s a helleaciously loud crackling noise heard through the speakers. You can also get this effect if you are on your home phone and a call comes in on the mobile, if they are near each other. Now we know this is caused by the interference of two conflicting radio signals, so it’s some sort of electromagnetic disturbance but I’m not a rocket scientist so don’t ask for any details.

Now we have noticed that we both often reach for our phones randomly, only to find that in the next few seconds the phone rings, or receives a message. From this we are guessing that the phone’s radio signal is causing a similar sort of electromagnetic interference – in our brains. (well in my friends brain, I’m more of the scarecrow type).

Anybody else notice anything similar – that feeling of going for the phone, only for it to ring as you reach for it? Or are we just a couple of freaks?

If this is happening, and it’s not our fevered imaginations, then what does that do to the theories of damage from mobile phones? We’re told not to worry but if we really are experiencing some sort of EME (electromagnetic event) isn’t this just a little bit significant?

Not that it worries me, my phone is my lifeline and quite essential and I’ll live with the risk of damage – hell maybe I’ll be able to sue the manufacturers to help fund my future retirement…..

Anything similar happened to anyone else out there?

Just a quickie
(maybe that's why I'm single)
My lovely Nokia has an auto update on the time functions so if you travel to a different time zone it automatically adjusts the time to reflect where you are. Also it adjusts for daylight saving twice a year to make things simpler for the great unwashed.
Problem uncovered in this process though.

Set my alarm for 8am this morning.
Alarm goes off.
I turn off the alarm and then the phone says
"Confirm auto time change for wintertime?"
Press OK and then the phone displays the time as 7am - doh.
Extra hour in bed is welcome but already being awake is not.

Nokia/Vodafone - sort it out please.

I admit to not being a big fan of Christmas - I have no kids, live on my own and seem to be constantly broke for most of the year, and am not that big on receiving gifts let alone giving them - but still why oh why do we have to start thinking about Christmas before the bloody clocks have even been adjusted for winter time?

When the clocks go forward in March = Summertime
When the clocks go back in October = Wintertime

Therefore you advertise for Christmas on the 27th October and you are doing this in the summer - STOP IT PLEASE.
All this means is that I'll spend the next two months gritting my teeth and will be so relieved to have Christmas over and done with that I'll not enjoy ANY of it.

Anybody give me a good reason why we should spend a sixth of our year being encouraged to spend our money on pointless things that no really wants in the first place.

Humbug